You Were My Soul Friend and I Miss You.

While I haven’t said goodbye to you, I know you’re gone, my once-in-a-lifetime, soul friend.

I distinctly remember our last hug. It said a thousand things that nobody could have understood; longer than most, tighter than all, more meaningful than even we knew.

It was a goodbye hug in a sense; a changing of direction for us both. An, “I’ll love you forever but our time has come to an end” 

I wish I could have saved you from yourself. I wish you were still the one I called with good news, bad news, and all the random in-between.

As much as I yearn for your friendship, guidance, and unspoken understanding – I know our time as best friends has come and gone. 

Still, I want to say thank you, my soul friend.

You taught me so much in our 10+ years of friendship. Because of you, I learned how to love myself and be myself without second thought. You taught me that emotions are beautiful and best friends are soulmates.

Thank you for loving the ugly parts of me and showing me that they aren’t really so ugly, after all.

And, thank you for being weird with me.

Thank you, soul friend, for sitting in silence with me when all I needed was an understanding presence.

Through the many heartbreaks, you stood strong by my side. We cried, sobbed, pitied ourselves. Then laughed about it until the tears turned joyful.

Thank you for inspiring me to be bold and authentic in a way that only a best friend can do. I appreciate you for being honest and vulnerable even when it was painful.

Thank you showing up, uninvited, with a coffee, plopping on my couch, and making fun of every person I ever dated… even my husband.

Bellyaching laughter. Bestie nights. Matching tattoos.

Our lives naturally fell together and our friendship naturally fell apart. It still hurts knowing that you aren't a call away; that you aren't visiting every few months like before.

No plans, no candid conversations, no video chats for no reason at all.

I miss knowing every second of your life and telling you every piece of mine. I miss us.

You were my family when I didn’t have one and my friend when my soul needed connection. My roommate, my bestie, my crazy & wild other half.

You were my soul friend and there will never, ever, be another one like you.

You were what I needed when I needed it for a huge chunk of my life. While our time has passed, I hope it’s only for now.

I truly pray our souls meet again and we become best friends, somehow.

I love you and I miss you.