Gift Guides Archives | But First, Joy

Inspiring ordinary women to find joy in everyday things. Get My Newsletter

Photo Gift Ideas for The Whole Family with deep discounts!

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20 Gifts to Increase Joy & Happiness (+ Giveaway)

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Baby Things To Buy Before Birth: A Complete List

Oprah’s Favorite Things for Under $50 (on Amazon)

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20 Gifts For Women In Their 20s: Trendy & Fun For Her

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15 Quality Gift Ideas for Better Sleep

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100+ Stocking Stuffers For Anyone

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20+ Thoughtful Gifts for Young Moms

Smart Home Gift Ideas for Moms Who Need a Break

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Best Disney Descendants Gifts for Super Fans + 3 Movie DVD Giveaway

20 Cute & Witty Mom Shirts on Amazon

16 Toddler Easter Basket Fillers – That Aren’t Candy

10 Magical Mermaid Gift Ideas for Kids – On Amazon

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13 Casual & Cute Heart Shirts on Amazon for Valentine’s Day

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30 Most Used Baby Items in the First Year

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Inspiring ordinary women to find joy in everyday things.

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I lost my grandmother a few days ago. While the

I lost my grandmother a few days ago.

While the pain is fresh and the grief is incredibly heavy, I am being very mindful with how I handle this loss.

My first instinct when I got the news was to ask myself what I could have done or said to make her life more enjoyable.

My second instinct was to beat myself up for what I didn’t do.

The third, was to ignore my feelings, hide my pain, and distract myself until her loss didn’t feel so heavy anymore.

There’s no right way to grieve but I can assure you that all that I mentioned, will not bring you closer to a place of peace.

We are beautiful, imperfect humans who have a tendency to either dwell on the negative or completely avoid feeling.

In reality, I know I was a wonderful granddaughter to her. I made a point to talk to her often, to openly express gratitude to her throughout my life, and to include her in the simple and grand moments.

Yet, there I was, beating myself up for not being around enough during a pandemic. 🤦🏻‍♀️ It was my instinct and it’s not what she would have wanted from me.

The deep healing work I’ve done in the past 6 months prepared me for THIS moment and allowed me to pay attention to my self-talk.

With that said, I’d like to share this advice:

You cannot heal unless you feel.

Numbing your pain, whether it be with illegal/unhealthy substances or distractions, will not make it go away. Doing so, is only postponing those feelings for a sober, quiet day.

So please, grieve when you need to grieve. Cry when you need to cry. Express your feelings when you’re on the verge of exploding. Pay attention to your self-talk and don’t stop caring about yourself even in your greatest moments of despair.

It’s okay to be vulnerable, it’s okay to seek professional help. It’s okay to be a human with real feelings.

It’s NOT okay to give up on yourself. You’re stronger than you think. I promise.

Thank you for reading. 🖤✨ – Joyce S.

#griefjourney #griefquotes #griefsupport #dontstoploving #selfcarejourney

Shout out to the moms who have absent mothers. 🙋🏻‍♀️ It’s not easy to parent without guidance or support.

I see you. I feel you. I understand the pain and confusion it brings to have a mother who chooses not to be in your life.

You deserve more.

You deserve to feel the love a mother gives to her children, the sense of security a mother gives, the endless motherly wisdom that’s passed from a mother to her daughter.

Even when you feel desperate in motherhood, I promise you this:

You’re doing a great job. You’re breaking generational cycles. Your children see you. You are their safe place and always will be. 🫂

And when you feel lost, trust your instinct. Your ancestors are guiding you. 🖤✨

I promise you have everything inside of you to raise those children with the compassion, love, and support you never received.

Keep going, mama. Nobody can do it like you. 🙌
— xoxo, Joyce at butfirstjoy.com

#lonelymom #unfilteredmotherhood #motherlessdaughters #motherlessparenting #motherlywisdom

I don’t always know what to say when I see the w

I don’t always know what to say when I see the world falling apart around me. As an empath, my heart aches heavily and because of that, I’ve found myself sitting in silence rather than standing up in support of my fellow human beings.

No longer will I do this. I understand that my silence speaks loudly and I’ve been too overwhelmed to say anything at all. For that, I apologize.

I see very clearly that this is WHITE PRIVILEGE.

My inaction has been truly shameful. Especially as a woman who has always been an advocate for #LoveOverHate.

I haven't said it ENOUGH so I will say this here today: I can feel your pain, friends. I know you're hurting and I'm sorry.

I'm sorry that everyone doesn't see your worth – but I do. I'm sorry your friends aren't standing up for you – but I will. And I will raise my children to do the same. ✊🏻✊🏽✊🏿

For my other friends, family, or supporters, I just want to remind you that I don't support or accept any kind of hate on my feeds or in my life – AT ALL.

If you stand for anything (or anyone) that encourages hate, I don’t want you in my space. 👋👋

If you’re like me and have been silent or just at a loss for WHAT to do/say to be an ally, my advice is:

STAND UP and SPEAK LOUD when you see or hear something offensive or harmful to anyone. It may not feel like a lot or enough – but it is.

Together, we can educate, protect, and set clear boundaries on what isn’t okay. A single person, in their lifetime, can save so many lives – by simply speaking up for what is right.

🙅‍♀️I encourage all of my friends to stop with the silence.

🙅‍♀️ Stop supporting people and businesses who ignore injustices and world issues.

🙅‍♀️ Stop pretending to be okay with family members and friends who make racist comments.

🙅‍♀️ Stop nodding your head when someone in power explains why they support ANYTHING that goes against basic human rights.

Who you support is a direct reflection of who you are.

✨ Please, share the stories of Asians and other POC, support their businesses, HIRE them, REACH OUT to them, let them know they aren’t in this fight alone!

#stopasianhate #stopaapihate #blacklivesmatter #blm

This is the shit I live for... life’s simple ple

This is the shit I live for... life’s simple pleasures. 🖤✨

It’s my son, cuddled up next to me on the couch, with his legs slung over me. A sign of complete comfort; a display of affection.

It’s pjs pants with characters and sitcoms plastered all over them (thanks @m0therthrifter). A gentle reminder not to take life too seriously; a simple reminder to choose comfort over style.

It’s staying up way too late just to watch one more episode of that show you thought you’d hate. Laughing to yourself as the rest of the house sleeps, knowing you’ll regret it in the morning... kinda.

It’s reading a damn good book until you’re forcing your eyes to focus because it’s 3am and you’ve been up since 6. It’s loving the story so much that you have trouble separating fiction from reality.

It’s splurging on takeout from your favorite restaurant because nobody else is around and you damn well deserve it. Doing a little dance before you eat, taking a picture for The Gram, and savoring every bite.

This is the shit I LIVE for! The tiny moments that make the days a little more special, that make life a little more whole.

Sisters, what are you living for?

#lifessimplepleasures #itsthelittlethings #butfirstjoy #findthejoy

If you’re a woman who isn’t feeling her best l

If you’re a woman who isn’t feeling her best lately, I want to remind you of a few things:

1. We were chosen to be the glue. We hold our families together. We make connections and build bonds that are so powerful that even the strongest forces can’t tear us apart.

2. We’re also the fuel. 🔥 Women keep things running smoothly. With pep talks, empathy, compassion, and an unexplainable force within us, we are the ones who push things to the next level. Even more powerful, we can pull people from the darkest spaces and make them feel light again.

3. Women are life. We literally create life. We build life. We protect the lives of others. We nurture people, pets, and plants back to life. We are truly MAGICAL! ✨

If you aren’t feeling confident lately, if the world is beating you down, if you just can’t seem to get out of bed some days – just know that you CAN and you WILL find your happy place again. You’ll find your spark. Just feel everything you need to feel, move through the waves, and allow yourself time to heal.

Happy #InternationalWomensDay to all my sisters on here. Visit my stories to see my highlighted women-owned shops/accounts! 💖✨ #womensupportingwomen

HOW TO SET STRICT BOUNDARIES: 1. Treat yourself a

HOW TO SET STRICT BOUNDARIES:

1. Treat yourself and others with kindness. This will raise your vibration and ward off those who don’t match your energy.

2. Have respectful conversations with those who violate your boundaries. 
3. Don’t violate your OWN boundaries.

4. Say NO to others more and YES to yourself often – without feeling guilty. 
5. Stand by everything you believe in and be LOUD about how you feel on important topics such as rac!sm, abuse, boundaries, and self-love. 
Ask yourself: Who do I need to set clearer boundaries with? Am I respecting my own boundaries? Are there toxic relationships that I need to end? Am I being true to myself?

#healthyboundaries #boundariesarehealthy #boundariesarebeautiful #settingboundaries

Are you showing your kids what it’s like to real

Are you showing your kids what it’s like to really LIVE life?

Or are you just getting by each day? Doing the bare minimum to survive?

Both are okay.

But, I’d like to challenge you, as a mother, to really start enjoying life.

It doesn’t matter if you can afford expensive things. You don’t have to go places or buy things to show your kids what it’s like to LIVE.

In fact, I’d dare to say it’s more important to show them that LIVING is enjoying the day-to-day things. Finding joy in the simple things, making fun out of nothing.

I dare you to show your children what it’s like to authentically:

Play. Laugh. Move. Have meaningful conversations. Nurture your body. Take care of things. Educate your mind. Have FUN!

PS. You don’t have to do these things WITH your children. They are watching you, imitating you, and learning how to live!

You are way too magical to NOT be loving yourself or to be loving a fun life!

#unfilteredmotherhood #mentalhealthmatters #selflovefirst

Darling, you look perfect. ✨ When is the last

Darling, you look perfect. ✨

When is the last time you looked in the mirror and loved the entire reflection? Curves, fine lines, stretch marks, cellulite, grey hairs... all of it?

Sadly, it doesn’t come easy... loving the way we look. We have commercials showing women with the perfect skin, shiny hair, and expensive clothing. We have picture-perfect Instagram accounts with moms who have it all put together.

I’m sure you’ve heard it before but I’ll tell you again: that isn’t real life, for most of us, at least. Us regular people... We have stress, sleepless nights, responsibilities, and years of negative things people have made us believe about ourselves.

It takes WORK to love the woman looking back at you. That work... it starts from within. It starts in your soul and your heart. When you start prioritizing your self-care and spirituality, you’ll notice everything in your life transforming.

One day, you’ll realize that you see someone else in the mirror... A woman with features passed down from her ancestors; a woman with marks that represent a life well-lived. More importantly, you’ll see how bright your aura is now that you’re loving even the darkest parts of your soul.

Ladies, remember, YOU ARE PERFECT. We see it; why can’t you?

#loveyourbody #humandesignprojector #selflovefirst #selflovetips