When you're an adult in a strong and committed relationship, you expect reactions to your pregnancy announcement to be positive, right? Unfortunately, not everyone reacts how you'd like them to. So, it's very important for you to not overthink or overreact to their reactions. Don't forget that breaking big news to someone for the first time means that you're prepared for an honest, authentic response. True feelings will reveal themselves and maybe that's not so bad. Starting a new journey, sometimes means removing the rusty anchors that are weighing you down. You now have so much to look forward to!
Best & Worst Reactions to my Pregnancy Announcement
Let's talk about those friends and family reactions to my pregnancy announcement. I individually called my closest friends and family members to reveal the big news to them personally. Most responses were full of pure joy, while some were a bit lackluster. I'm writing this to help you first time mommies or even 2nd, 3rd, 4th time mommies navigate through the varied reactions. I just want you to know that you're not the only one.
“What!? Omg! Congrats! I'm so happy for you!”
That's the reaction I got from the few friends I revealed my pregnancy to. Most of my friends are mommies so they've been waiting for me to join the mom club for quite sometime now. Their reactions were completely genuine and exactly what you'd want. Even my non-mommy friends were basically jumping up and down for me.
My best friend literally pulled me on top of her and hugged me as she teared up.
Those are the people who check on me daily and have made me feel so much more comfortable as my body changes from a woman into a mother.
“I knew it!” or “I had a feeling!”
Wait? You knew it before I did? I haven't talked to you at all about my symptoms but you “had a feeling”? That's weird. I didn't hint at anything and we weren't trying to have a baby, but you knew?
Gotta love someone who downplays the surprise factor.
“I never thought you'd have a baby”
Yes, I know. It's so hard to believe that me, a 28 year old, soon-to-be married woman with her shit together is going to have a baby. Little ole me, who has a career and a stable home, is going to have a baby. Joyce, who babysits your children and loves them as if they were her own, is going to have a baby. The woman you run to when you “need a little help” is pregnant! The one who was “careful” until she was in a healthy, emotionally and financially beautiful, relationship is going to be a mother! How terribly shocking.
It does sting a little. Well, a lot. But, I take it as a hard lesson learned. It's interesting to see what people really think of you.
“I thought you were going to wait until after the wedding!”
That was legit the first thing someone very close to me said. Has she never heard of someone getting pregnant without actually trying? Yeah, ideally it would be great to not be pregnant at my wedding. But the universe had something better in store for me.
Everything happens for a reason and this beautiful baby growing inside of me, was a blessing meant to happen now.
“You're lying! Ha ha very funny”
Pregnancy is nothing to joke about but, because of the nature of my relationship with this person, I totally get why he didn't believe me. Our conversations highly consist of pranks and sarcasm, so it took some convincing for him to believe that I actually am carrying a child.
For the record, after he realized I was telling the truth he was overly excited! He talked about all the things he'd teach my baby and how he's waited for this for so long. I could cry right now thinking of it.
“Laughter”
Initially, I thought “What's so damn funny?” Then, I realized the laughter was out of pure joy and exciting. Many friends and family members laughed through their tears of happiness. My grandmother let out the biggest, happiest laugh I've ever heard.
“I could tell!”
Talk about insulting! That was a huge foot-in-the-mouth statement made by someone. I wouldn't be insulted had I been showing already, but I wasn't. In fact, I announced my pregnancy before I was showing. Which means, that I definitely looked fat the last time that person saw me. Thanks, person. Thanks.
Those were the main first pregnancy reactions I received. I also had a lot of people asking very personal questions about my choices as a woman and a mother. Words like “circumcision, breastfeeding, natural birth, and vaccinations” come to mind. Oh what joy motherhood and the judgments from other moms will bring. I'll save that conversation for another post, though.
Thank you everyone for reading about my first pregnancy reactions! We’re so excited to have your continued love and support as we partake on this grand journey. You’ll be seeing a new motherhood column on Women and Their Pretties very soon! What kind of crazy reactions did you receive from your first pregnancy? Tell us in the comments below!
Be sure to visit my “First Trimester” post to read my journey through great, denial, and excitement! Up next is my Maternity Gift Guide which will feature gifts for mommies only!
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I know this is pretty late here lol, but my least favorite reaction from a very close friend has been an almost complete lack of reaction. Especially since it was accompanied with “[Long pause after being told] Oh…” then waiting on me to say something again. I don’t know if it was mostly out of worry for COVID related reasons or what, but I made it pretty clear that we were really excited from the beginning and it’s still had me really upset even after about a month of telling them. Tomorrow we’re telling my in-laws, then next week my immediate family, but I was already so anxiety-ridden to tell many other people – but especially our families I’ve been anxious to tell all along anyway. Even though it’s my second pregnancy (our first is two right now, so that’s been quite a ride, lol), and even though we definitely weren’t planning or expecting it, and despite everything happening in the world right now, we’re still absolutely thrilled. It feels pretty insulting to be honest, and it’s hard not to take it too personally (what isn’t though when you’re this hormonal, lol); but I’m sure a lot of women are dealing with greater anxiety levels around telling their friends and families about their pregnancies right now, too, and I really feel for them – not to mention how scary it probably really is for a lot of them who haven’t been as lucky as my husband and me through all this in every other aspect, too… Part of me understands why there might be more mixed/negative reactions right now, but it still just doesn’t feel right when you make it so clear that you’re excited and that you’re optimistic that things will get better and that you still see it as a miracle to be thankful for… So that’s what brought me here, lol. Really great article! Thank you for writing it, and I’m glad to have come across your blog after reading it! 🙂
That’s heartbreaking! What a horrible experience. I’m so sorry for your loss!
Mother in law gave half hearted congratulations and then talked about her niece’s Recent miscarriage. For an hour. I miscarried at seven weeks and she suggested we get together for some fresh tuna she’d bring back from the Caribbean.
[…] Just be sure you’re sharing with the people who deserve to be by your side and remember that everyone has an opinion – everyone! If you’re being criticized for your pregnancy journey then it’s their problem – not […]
[…] What does it matter? A planned pregnancy definitely isn’t any more or less special than an unplanned pregnancy. […]
It is so sad when people aren’t happy for your wonderful news. But that is their issues. You are going to be a wonderful mother. The universe does not make mistakes and they chose wisely when it gave you this beautiful precious gift to watch over, love and to teach.
I will admit it does hurt when people say these things. I remember when we first told the family about the teen boy. After 8 long years of trying we finally found out, we were pregnant we were so excited. When we told family several and I quote “You aren’t going through with the pregnancy right?” I kid you not they actually asked if we were going to terminate the pregnancy and when we said no they said we were stupid and selfish for going through with it because of my health issues. It was a very tense moment.
OMG That’s the worst! You can’t help but to feel offended! I’ve always had my life together and have always been mature so when people say that to me, I’m like WTF makes you think that?
& yes. Thank you for the advice! I think my biggest fear in parenting is all of the judgement from other moms. It’s sad that so many compete to be mom of the year rather than supporting one another.
I appreciate your comments so much! Thanks for reading!
In the hospital, right after I had my daughter, my sister-in-law said (I kid you not), ” I never thought y’all would have kids. Y’all just don’t seem like the type.”
Ummm…thanks? What do you even say to that? I was pretty annoyed. And honestly shocked. I mean I had always wanted Childers and who says that right after someone gives birth?
I will say this…don’t take what people say too seriously. You will hear so many comments throughout touring parenting journey. People have an opinion on everything and don’t know when to keep their mouths shut. Just brush it off, hun.